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Hanging Out with Michael Jackson

Michael wasn't just "The Man in The Mirror;" Michael was the mirror. You won't see the light in Michael, if you don't recognize it in yourself. You won't decode the message unless you know what you are looking for or understand what you're looking at. You have to resonate. You won't get Michael's invitation unless you understand that "we are the world" and "you're the chosen one." You have to be in touch with your Inner Michael.



MAY YOU MEET YOUR INNER MICHAEL HERE!



for... Michael Messages

 

More about the Spiritual nature of his work.

Sunday

Michael Jackson- Becoming White

Suppose your face is your fortune, your career places you in the public eye and your livelihood depends on always looking polished and perfect and glittering with some new and unique wardrobe because the public that elevated you to stardom has come to expect that of you. Suppose that as someone in the limelight, you know that the public has a short attention span, can be fickle and is easily swayed by propaganda.

Suppose you have worked hard, driven yourself to reach a pinnacle of success and attained a modicum of fame because of your contribution to an industry loaded with not only lots of talent but fierce competition. Suppose you knew that your staying relevant in that industry demanded that you always be inventing something fresh and new to keep people clamoring after your product. Suppose that to keep yourself contemporary and in demand you had to frequently reinvent yourself along the way.

Suppose that you have achieved a level of fame where your name and product are instantly recognized round the world. What If you loved your work and loved your audiences and that creating, for you, is like breathing—you can’t live without it. What if your survival hinged on your voice, your body, your appearance, and your overall appeal? And what if that chosen industry is monitored and scrutinized by a very public medium with the power to make or break you and your future—the press? What if there are few in that peering industry who are kind and supportive and what if most are mean spirited and interested only in “the story”—juicy news with details of scandals, foibles and fodder for failure? What if they are just waiting for you to misstep? What if they are perpetually just poised to pounce?

And given all that pressure to stay present and relevant, what if your body, the machine that drives the whole enterprise starts to have some serious problems? What if your body begins to betray you? To turn on itself? What if your whole reason for being is suddenly in question? What if the future is uncertain? And what if a fickle public with a short attention span and an even shorter memory begins to lose interest because you no longer look good? When your life is in the spotlight? What do you do then?

Would you try to hide your imperfections? Of course. We all do it. We wear body stockings; have breast enhancements; take Viagra; use creams and hormones and soaps and perfumes; die our hair or get perms; use augmented undergarments; wear lifts or high heels; work out at the gym; buy the latest fashions; get tattoos or piercings; have hair extensions; get pedicures and nails done; take vitamins; go on a diet; visit the tanning parlor and a thousand other things to remain attractive and relevant.

So when Michael Jackson was diagnosed with Vitiligo—a disease that turns the skin white, around 1983, why was it so difficult to understand how threatening that would have been to someone who made his living on the stage? How is it that when he explained what was going on with his body, some refused to believe him? A disease that mars your face and body must be very threatening to someone who makes their living on stage. It must raise huge self esteem issues—something not foreign to Michael, for he had acne as a teen. It has to feel like a huge betrayal to have your own body, your own immune system turn against you. You must question and blame yourself initially. You must feel a sense of shame and want to hide your blemished body and marred being.

Might it have been frightening and disheartening as the first black entertainer to do so many pioneering things only to see yourself losing your racial identity? Would it hurt to hear yourself being accused of deliberately betraying and abandoning your race? How could the public not understand how painful that must have been for a man who grew up in a famous black family? A man who grew up with James Brown who, for a whole generation of kids, made it OK to be black teaching them to sing: “I’m black and I’m Proud.”

When someone contracts cancer, we do not blame that victim. We do not berate them for the changes to their bodies. We do not condemn the chemotherapy that is a necessary treatment to keep the disease in remission.

Does anyone ask for a disease that causes the body to change into someone unrecognizable? Does one wish for a disease that progresses and engulfs one’s whole being, that makes a day at the beach impossible, that precludes romping in the sunlight with your children because it’s dangerous, that causes you to live your life under umbrellas because your condition gets worse without them? How does one bear the accusations of “liar” from those who feel you are abandoning your own ethnic origins? How does one stand the label “freak” when the changes in your body are involuntary and require concealment in order to keep up the public persona and superstardom status the world has come to expect? How does one not become bitter, angry, less than human? How does one continue to perform center-stage knowing that the makeup conceals a secret and hides a fear that if revealed could repulse even the most loyal of your public?

Vitiligo is a disease that causes its host to lose pigmentation in the skin. Pasty white patches begin to appear and as the disease progresses, more and more skin takes on that pasty hue. Universal Vitiligo, the severe form, which Michael Jackson had, affects more than 80% of the body. The disease erases pigmentation making the skin eventually appear transluscent. In the beginning stages the skin becomes blotchy as the body begins to attack its own melanocyte cells that produce skin color. As the disease progresses, more and more of the body turns white until an African American becomes more white than black. What remains then to treat it, is to even up the skin tones. In the beginning, a black person could use dark makeup to cover the de-pigmented areas. But as more and more of the body is affected, full body makeup becomes impractical. Later, as one becomes more and more white, destroying the remaining pigmentation to even out the color of the skin becomes the one viable option.

Sunlight aggravates the condition and speeds the progression of Vitiligo. Sunscreen becomes imperative. Spending time at the beach or in direct sunlight can cause severe problems. Living under an umbrella to block the sun would at least slow the disease and prevent skin problems or reactions to sunlight. It seems the umbrella created mystery and cast more than a reasonable lack-of-sunlight shadow on Michael Jackson. Metaphor for mysterious? Oh yes, and very effective for it drew attention. And how Michael loved attention; his career, of course, depended on it. But how did it become a metaphor for not just mystery but darkness?

How did Michael take the risk when he stepped out from the most personal of places—one’s medical record and history and gave a public interview, revealing with great trepidation that there is something wrong with his body? That his immune system is not working properly, that he is struggling with issues of trust of his own body that appears to have betrayed him? That his identity, his appearance and all that he stands for has created for him, an existential crisis because an involuntary disease has made its home in his body—a body that is important for stage presence, for performance, for identity, for status, his work and his life? How does he then reconcile revealing that most intimate of secrets of his life and then be called a liar? What is more intimate than one’s own body? What is more preciously guarded? What is more threatening to a star on stage, than involuntary changes in health and appearance?


Michael hid his condition for a long time, trying even to hide it from his makeup artist. He didn't want to reveal this most private of struggles publicly. Yet his Vitiligo was becoming more and more visible, the changes in his skin tone more and more obvious. Yet Michael, ever the perfectionist, didn't want to disappoint his audience. Eventually there was no choice but to reveal his condition.

Would we have called the cancer patient a liar? Would we have condemned her for seeking treatment for a life threatening illness? Michael deserved our compassion, not ridicule. Where was the understanding for this man who was dealing with an illness that threatened his very life as he knew it and as we knew it? Where was the the message: “you are still beloved?” Still relevant? Still human? Still the Michael we have grown to expect, to love? The Michael that we have made larger than life? The one we expect to dazzle us? The one we expect to be perfect in our eyes? Where was our humanness? Our compassion?

National Vitiligo Foundation: http://nvfi.org/index.php

Tuesday

Michael and the Drum- A Dialogue


D: “Your eyes sparkled tonight.”
B: “Really?”
D: “Yeah, in fact you kind of sparkled. And you had that look.”
B: “What look?”
D: “Well, it’s not just your eyes that sparkled. You kind of sparkled. Like you just came from a spa or something.”
B: “Interesting choice of words-- Sparkle.”
D: “So what’s going on? Are you in love again or something? What secret have you been keeping from me?”
B: “No, not ‘in love’—more like ‘Love in;’ I had just come from a love in. I was hanging out with Sparkles—Sparkle people. And John Lennon. I suppose you could call it a spa—a Sparkle bath. Bathed in L-O-V-E.
D: “Ok, now you got me. You’d better spill it Cheyenne Sister!”
B: “Yeah OK, Oneida ‘Princess!’ I know, never turn your back on an Indian! Well, before I came to circle tonight I went to a ‘love in.’ It’s a worldwide love meditation held by Michael’s Sparkle people. See, in one of Michael’s songs he talks about creating a “Major Love” around the planet. It’s a reference to the spiritual planetary wave. And a fan has created a space to do the meditation every month on the 25th day. She sent an invitation and the link. People all over the world focus on love and sending out love to the world.”
D: “And they get together every month? Because of Michael? Amazing. Wow; so how was it?”
B: “Brings you to your knees. I was sobbing. I felt it; I felt the love. It was like being in the John Lennon vibe again. I just cried and cried. This is ‘good medicine’ they do.”
D: “Aho! No wonder you looked radiant. You know, during the circle- I looked over at you and you were gone. You were rockin' it, sister. I have no idea where you were, but you weren’t here.”
B: “I know. I travel. And did you feel the Haiti thing? I just set an intention for Haiti. For healing. And when I started with the rain stick, I had no idea where it would go. But the circle started the syncopation right away. How cool was that? And who was echoing the chant with me—that was haunting. It had to be B, right? She knows how to get between the harmonies. She’s intuitive that way. I couldn’t open my eyes. I was afraid I would lose the vision—I could see them; I could see the Haitians. I could see them healing; healed. Talk about major love.”
D: “I know that one was awesome. The whole circle was feeling it. And the Elders were there—did you hear them?”
B: “You know, I did hear a kind of drone in the background. You think it was the Elders? I thought it was overtones. They were all around us. That sanctuary amplifies everything; the acoustics are stunning in that space.”
D: “Oh the Elders were there. They were standing around the circle. We called and they came.”
B: “Ok, I got goose bumps now. What an amazing day. Thank you for arranging the circle."
D: "I am so happy to do it. I love it. I thought about Michael too in tonight's circle. You think he was here?”
B: “Oh yeah. I think Michael definitely was hanging out in a few places tonight. I don’t think Michael ever had the chance to go to a drum circle.”
D: “It’s really sad, isn’t it—how he never had a normal life. How he never got to just hang out with ordinary people? You think he would have liked jamming in drum circle?”
B: “Are you kidding? Well, he certainly would have understood the voice of the drum, the spirit of the drum and the drumming. How drums speak to you. How sometimes they tell you what they want to play, want to say. He would have understood the prayers in the drum, in the spirit. And Spirit. Michael would have felt the Elders. Felt Creator.”
D: “Yes; I was just thinking about his Black and White video. I know what it meant to me when I first saw it. I think Michael would have loved Pow Wow too. He would have danced, would have fit right in.”
B: “Well he sort of got a feel for it tonight.”
D: “You think he was there?”
B: “I think Michael loved it.”
D: “Could you see Michael sitting in circle? Imagine smudging Michael Jackson and his drum in circle!”
B: “Did you just say… ‘Imagine?’ There’s John again.”
D: “Oh, now I have goose bumps.”
B: “Maybe we should intentionally invite Michael next time. We could give him his own chair. We could smudge him. Leave a drum there for him. What do you think?”
D: "Oh my God, would that be an awesome experience. That's great. I love it! Good medicine."
B: “May we invite John too?”
D: “Oh yes! Of course! Wouldn’t that just be a major love in!”
B: “Maybe we could ask for healing from Spirit. And for healing the shadow. And for Major L-O-V-E”

D: “We could intentionally drum with Michael for Michael.”
B: “A love-in with drums! Stellar idea!”
D: “I think we should do it! Let’s!”
B: "Whoa, what was that?"
D: "I don't know; it sounded like a drum. Can't be. Everybody's gone."
B: "Maybe not everybody."
D: “Wow, did you feel that? That was strange. What do you think that was?”
B: “I think Michael loves the idea.”

http://www.majorloveprayer.org/

Saturday

Michael and the Soul- a shapeshifter

Shamans live and work in more than one dimension. Shamans keep one foot in both worlds—the mundane world of everyday life and the world of non-ordinary-reality. The outer planes and the inner planes hold different realities but they echo in many ways. “As above so below” can describe that interplay as well as the interplay of the microcosm with the macrocosm. For all our evolution, it is still a world of duality.

The human soul holds the dichotomy and dualities in perfect balance. It is not exclusionary. It does not favor holding one manifestation superior to another; it does not choose; rather than the either/or of the dualistic world, it holds both/and in harmony. It is whole, holistic—a kind of hologram that includes the blueprint of the Divine—the original impulse of creation. It is a thing of great beauty. The human who engages the soul in the work or has a soul-infused personality is that same reflected “thing of beauty.” Some people just are beautiful, their beauty almost ethereal. Michael was intimate with this beauty.

Both Michael himself and certainly his work, seems to embody or hold in balance the essential soul qualities. One reader put it this way: “I've thought that Michael has been an amazing reflection of the soul which is both yet neither aspects of our Universe's duality: male and female in appearance and voice; black and white; sexuality and non-sexuality; threatening and non-threatening; identified with a country and culture yet global; child yet adult; the essence of innocence yet accused of the unthinkable.” [paraphrased-edited]

I’ve been looking for an answer to this contradiction that was Michael Jackson and have come to the conclusion that Michael truly was/is the ultimate soul mirror. How and why this is the case is still a bit mysterious but its unfolding continues. Michael reflects everything about the human condition and seems to do it on many levels, in many dimensions, many languages, and in mythological and mystical terms. Michael is alchemical. Michael is a shape-shifter. Michael is a shaman.

There is the sexy or naughty Michael juxtaposed with the wholesome and innocent Michael:

There are the leather and buckles that seem dark, brooding, sensual and Bad; there are the white shirts and suits that are the color of purity and innocence. There is the bad-boy and the darling. There is the Michael who spanks his singing partner while she’s freeze-frame in dance, and the Michael who cradles female fans in a tender and intimate embrace. There is the dangerous male dancer with the grinding movements that can mimic the sex act and depict the rise of Kundalini spiritual energy at the same time. There is the crotch grabbing Michael who seems to gesture a need to hold in the creativity in the place it is birthed so that it doesn’t leak out from his being; and the Michael that assumes spiritual poses like supplication and crucifixion.

There is the black and white Michael:

There is the white skinned yet black African American. Obviously African American in Thriller, Michael begins to show symptoms of Vitiligo sometime after that music video is made. The Vitiligo gave him large areas of pasty white skin from de-pigmentation, the hallmark of the disease. Once gone, the pigment never returns and eventually more white than black, Michael submitted to the recommended and subscribed treatments of lasers and cream to even his skin tones. Michael begins to look more like a Caucasian by the time he makes “Black or White” where he dances with people from a variety of racial, ethnic and cultural backgrounds. Toward the end of his life, Michael begins to appear Albino- someone with no pigmentation at all, no discernable race or ethnicity. In the light spectrum we know that white contains all colors. Was Michael himself truly a man for all seasons? Was he a visible example of a human without race, without color or with all colors, all races?

There is the man-child who is Michael.

Michael, in childhood, was a sophisticated performer from the moment he took the stage. Dick Clark remembers Michael’s savvy well and thought of him as a middle aged man in a child’s body. As Dick began to introduce and interview the Jackson 5, Michael took the microphone from him introducing his brothers himself. Dick knew then that this was a child destined for greatness.

Michael was always soft-spoken with a quiet voice yet it is reported that he was a consummate manager who knew how to motivate his staff with few words. His business acumen is legendary; his skill as a manager and leader was respected. Michael was a perfectionist who demanded his own excellence and recruited excellence in others simply with simple expectation or encouragement.

Yet Michael loved the “elementary things” that he talked about in Have You Seen my Childhood? Neverland Ranch, before defiled by accusations and invasion, was a sanctuary and magical place that nourished the child in everyone who visited. Michael hosted many guests there: children, adults and families. Gregory Peck found it rejuvenating; McCauley Culkin found it exhilarating and Elizabeth Taylor thought it enchanting. Michael had a special tree that he liked to climb where he became inspired, writing many of his lyrics cradled in its boughs. What adult among us has not longed to climb trees to find safe haven again? Neverland featured a magical theme park atmosphere with movie theatre with candy and snacks, a train, golf carts and a zoo filled with all kinds of animals. All visitors were expected to participate in water fights. Although adept with a Super Soaker water gun, Michael’s preferred ammunition was water balloons. Football was another favorite especially of Shawn Lennon, John Lennon’s son who visited and stayed often.

Michael’s home featured life size figures and sculptures of real characters and the characters of legends. A life-size cookie butler held a tray of Neverland’s legendary chocolate chip cookies. Dolls, knights, angels, cherubs, children, animals and fantasy characters graced the halls and grounds of the mansion. Neverland was built partly for Michael himself to recapture the childhood lost at the hand of a stern taskmaster father determined to catapult his musical family to fame and fortune. Michael loved Disneyland but could not go out in public without being mobbed. He built a scaled down model of his own Disneyland behind the gates of his estate. But Neverland was also a place for hosting children who might never otherwise visit such a place or who were sick, many whom expressed a dying wish to meet Michael and visit Neverland. Thousands of children romped at Neverland—Michael’s way of gifting them Disneyland style. Inner city youth, kids coping with cancer and other diseases, at risk children, reform school incarcerates, disadvantaged children, handicapped and special needs kids all were welcomed to Neverland. Far from the predator some painted him to be, Michael was a father to all those children. Michel knew as Hillary Clinton did, that it takes a village. A global village.

Contrast that Michael with the polished performer, the star quality stage presence, the adult themes in lyrics and certain songs, some sensual costuming and the appealing adult male persona. People wondered how this man could embody both the child-man and polished star who commanded the stage and the audience. A shy person in public, Michael shape-shifted the moment he hit the stage. He was comfortable only while performing, felt safe only on stage; he didn’t like interviews or conversations. He preferred to let his music and art speak for him. Michael Jackson was literally hiding in plain sight.

Many wondered who was this man… really? Most people had never seen anything like him and struggled to define and to understand. Michael was a visible example of the melding of the duality. An embodiment of the duality itself, he was the personification of an interplay of opposites, puzzles and contradictions.

The angry Michael and the tender Michael.
At times when he is performing, Michael appears to set his jaw and looks angry. More than once he has been labeled with the cliché` description “angry young man.” Michael found the injustices of the world painful and once he identified them, he would often take them on in lyrics. He was especially sensitive to the exploitation and destruction of the planet for profit.

A sensitive senses the magnitude of the emotion. An empath feels the collective of those things. Empaths feel the onslaughts and assaults that affect the world, that impact humanity. There are those people who feel the world’s collective pain, humanity’s collective pain. Michael was one of them.

Michael’s body itself was an instrument of the music, the song, the performance. His body was like the flute through which inspiration blows—a portal thorough which to enter into existence and birth itself in the world. Michael was gifted and he always said his gift was God-given. If God was the author; Michael was the book. If God was the composer; Michael was the score. In Michael’s very first album he talks about the Force, a reference to the Force from Star Wars- the same Force that animates the Universe. He says about the Force: “don’t stop ‘till you get enough.” For Michael, that Force was always more than enough. Instead of the wind that blows through the flute to express the music, the wind that blew through Michael was gale force. And it was that kind of sustained force with everything he did. Michael’s Force was forever amplified.

That kind of force in creativity can appear angry because its’ power is so unexpected, so awe producing. A river can have pools, ripples, rapids and waterfalls—it’s the same water but different intensities. And always the source is the river. The power of the river cannot be stopped. When you are in the river, you are going where the river takes you. There is no way to swim against the current; resistance, as they say, is futile. When in that kind of swift force, there is no way to reach shore; there is only the careening downstream. Better to peer ahead for the next passage and perhaps obstacles than to fight a current that can’t be stopped. There is no way to get out of the way of the river; the only thing to do is get self out of the way, and go where the river takes you. You are going anyway.

When white knuckles and white water takes you, it’s good to know the source of that force. Hopefully it’s the river of life and not destruction. Hopefully it’s the River Jordan that cradles you and sweeps you along and not the River Styx.

The Masculine and Feminine Michael:
While often appearing androgynous and embodying traits of both the masculine and feminine, there were times when Michael was blatantly masculine in his features and presentation. His maleness oozed at times and at others it was quietly understated in the background. His interpretations of a Bad gang member and Smooth Criminal highlights a more hard driving maleness of the characters while the Egyptian magician in Remember the Time and the Greco-Roman androgynous youth in You are Not Alone are more feminine interpretations of the male we see despite his ministrations to women in both films.

Michael wore makeup, lipstick and eyelashes which today are accepted as part of the trappings of “show biz” but at his popularity peak, some thought it evidence of his being “gay” which was a much more highly charged issue then. It’s no longer considered too feminine or a product of “gayness” and is more widely accepted as “art.” Everybody tries to find their “shtick” that will stick. Celebrities must necessarily re-invent themselves to stay contemporary and relevant. Michael knew how to be not only relevant and contemporary but endearing, daring and enduring.

The Dangerous Michael and the Innocent Michael:
In Thriller, Michael morphs into a werewolf and threatens his partner. In Ghost he loses his human flesh and becomes a wraith bringing death into the conversation. In Smooth Criminal he is a mafia-type who dispatches his enemies with a machine gun. In Rock My World he is the slick male womanizer and seducer. In Come Together Michael is the vinyl clad sexy and dangerous Rock Star you don’t want your daughter around. Have You Seen My Childhood finds Michael sitting alone in the forest dreaming of holding onto his inner child. He looks every bit the child uncomfortable with the world adults have created. The boyish charm of Michael in the Greco-Roman setting of You are Not Alone with his wife Lisa Marie Presley, speaks of charming youth and budding love. In Will You be There Michael is the human asking for Divine companionship through the trials of life and the stumbling of the man and mankind. At one point in the dance, Michael is lifted by the dancers—is this gesture about the resurrection of the soul?

The Showman Michael and the Waif:
Michael Jackson was a student of P.T. Barnum and he understood the value of surprise, juxtaposition and startling your audience with the unexpected. He also understood the value of creating anticipation. Michael deliberately placed subliminals and startling images in his work. He knew how to raise eyebrows, get attention and then deliver the message. The impact and unforgetability of the outrageous was not lost on Michael. He caused both murmuring and loud outcry. He knew how to tease and “simmer” before delivering the sizzle. Some called that genius. He also had the appeal of the lost and alone little boy. The one mothers wanted to adopt and women wanted to hold. That is the waif who becomes the forbidden secret lover in the heart. The cynical might think that manipulation; the worldly would call it savvy and showmanship but the majority of women would call that endearing and appealing.

The Human Michael and the Spiritual Messenger:
Michael speaks of human failings in his work—those of himself and those of humanity. In Will You Be There he says that a man is expected to stand and walk even when not able; his is expected to find inner strength in the face of whatever trial or tribulation befalls him. In anguish Michael cries “But I’m only human!”

Michael’s lyrics throughout, talk about human feelings. These feelings always appear in relationship—with a love interest, with the Divine, with the Earth, with humanity. It is all relational, all relationship-speak.

Many of Michael’s songs and the body of his work is prayer, a global plea to humanity to make the world better, to care for the children, to save their planet, their future. This Spiritual Messenger who is Michael has a message… sometimes loud, sometimes subtle, sometimes subliminal. He knows how to grab attention, makes sure everybody is watching; then he creates the tension of anticipation ("you have to let it simmer!") and WHAM! The message is delivered.

Michael says in his work “seems like the world has a role for me.” Michael knew. And he knew that he knew. And he knew that somehow we knew. We did and we do.


(c) B. Kaufmann 2010 and beyond

Monday

Dancing the Moon

Michael Jackson had a special relationship with the moon. In his book: Dancing the Dream, he tells of his conversations with the moon:

"I cannot escape the moon. Its soft beams push aside the curtains at night. I don’t even have to see it—a cool blue energy falls across my bed and I am up. I race down the dark hall and swing open the door. Not to leave home but to go back to it. ‘Moon, I’m here!’ I shout.

“Good,” she replies. Now give us a little dance.”

Michael’s signature dance: the moonwalk. The moon is a symbol of the Divine feminine, of watery mysteries, mysticism and alchemy. The moon has heard many conversations, been part of many rituals, lighted many ceremonial evenings, listened to many prayers and a holds wisdom, knowledge and magic for indigenous peoples of many origins, many cultures. There are many ancient moonwalkers.

Michael wanted to visit the moon in his lifetime.NASA was contacted and Edgar Mitchell was excited about the possibility of the terrestrial world's known moonwalker someday visiting the moon. He was able to see it happening for Michael and that it would be only a matter of time.

Edgar Mitchell, while in space during a moon mission had his own extraordinary mystical experience and came back to found the Institute of Noetic Science which to this day, is a cutting edge research avenue into man’s relationship with the cosmos. NASA thought Michael might make it to the moon sooner than anyone could imagine.

Michael loved space, the moon, stars, the cosmos and NASA. At the end of his concerts during his “Dangerous” tour, he became his dream-- an astronaut complete with suit, gear and helmet.

A fan reported, though not confirmed by family, that Michael was interred in September just as the moon went into its full phase. She says the interment was Thursday September 3, 2009 at 9:43 Pacific time. She contacted her planetarium to find out if her suspicions were confirmed. The report: On September 3, 2009 at 9:L43 pm the moon was 99.76% full at 28 degrees in the southeast. It rose at 7:02 pm PDT and will set at 6:44am on the 4th. She believes Michael’s family did something special for Michael. Michael was born when the moon was full. His funeral occurred during full moon and it appears he was interred with the moon when full. It's a lovely thought for the one constant mistress and love of his life was the moon.

He was interred in a section called the Sanctuary of Ascension in Holly Terrace at the Forest Lawn Memorial Park in Los Angeles… city of angels.

About dancing in moonlight, Michael says “This is my favorite dance, because it contains a secret. The faster I twirl, the more I am still inside. My dance is all motion without, all silence within. As much as I love to make music, it’s the unheard music that never dies. And silence is my real dance, thought it never moves. It stands aside, my choreographer of grace, and blesses each finger and toe.

“I have forgotten the moon now and the sea and the dolphins, but I am in their joy more than ever. As far away as a star, as near as a grain of sand, the presence rises, shimmering with light. I could be in it forever, it is so loving and warm. But touch it once, and light shoots forth from the stillness. It quivers and thrills me and I know my fate is to show others that this silence, this light, this blessing is my dance. I take this gift only to give it again.

Quick, give! Says the light.”

(c) 1992 Dancing the Dream, Michael Jackson


Breakfast with Hope: A Dialogue

Waitress Jill: "Here's your coffee; now how would you like those eggs?
B: "Moon side up."
Jill: "Pardon me?"
B: "Just kidding. Sunny side up."

S: Thank you, the same for me."

B: “It’s been a long time.”
S: “Way too long.”
B: “I miss doing dream circle; how many years was it we dreamed together?"
S: “Me too; we should do a Dream Reunion with the group.”
B: “Well, that’s kind of why I called you.”
S: “Ok, so what’s on your mind?”
B: “Well, I know you will understand this. And as a psychologist you know I respect your opinion. Besides, I trust you; I’ve wandered around in your dreams.”
S: “I remember; you always had such deep dreams; so much meaning. Sometimes I wondered where you were hanging out at night!”
B: ‘Yeah, well then this dreamscape should come as no shock to you…”
(More conversation)


S: ‘Wow, this work sounds really, really important."
B: "Oh, that’s not all. The people who come—the admirers, the fans, those new to Michael, those revisiting his work, those who felt something after his death, those who are curious… they are all having an awakening. Or they are reminded of their knowing. And they are all living Michael’s message in some way.”
S: "Are you saying it’s some kind of collective phenomenon?"
B: "That’s exactly what I am saying. It’s happening all over the world. All kinds of people.”
S: “So you think all these people are tapped into something in the collective unconscious?”
B: “I know they are. But it’s not all unconscious. The levels of knowledge and understanding are different. Some know the mission in the message; some sense something but feel confused. Most are still very tender and raw with grieving and from processing shadow.”
S: “But they are all having this similar experience; like a collective dream?”
B: “Precisely- a collective dream. What I want to know is if you guys have a name for this. Have you heard of this kind of experience before? Has someone done studies, some cutting edge research, maybe a dissertation?”
S: “Oh my; I have a friend who is a Jungian Psychologist; I remember her saying that she had some kind of epiphany and was really curious about Michael Jackson and his work…”
(More conversation)

B: “So, you get the picture here? You get the magnitude?”
S: “I have to tell you that you have just given me more hope than I have encountered anywhere from anyone in… well, I can’t remember! And you understand what this means for them, for you, for the future, for the world?”
B: “Oh yes; I completely understand the potential and the vector of this experience. I get glimpses of where it’s going, where we are all going. I get hints and nudges and sometimes I get launched. Occasionally lurched... forward. It fits with what I already know, my exploration and the path my life has taken, the ministry and work. It is the message. It is the alchemy.”
S: “This is so exciting! These people are already in that frequency! They get it about infusing love into the collective! I always saw him as a kind of tragic figure. Well, this has really changed my mind. I am intrigued. I'm glad you called, glad you told me. I had no idea the genius of the man!"

B: “The genius of him and whom he recruited! They are all living the message, dreaming the collective dream.” You know the archetypal message: mythic tragic hero, the king, Camelot, the chalice and the sword, the treasure in the holy grail..."
S: “So… the work in the dream circle…”
B: “Oh that was only the beginning. Oh sweet sleep perchance to dream! Wait till you see the movie! Starring Earth! Dream in the flesh… and it shimmers. Sheer illumination. Bio luminescence! Divine Sparkle!”
S: “Wow; I have to tell you something… my body feels lighter all of a sudden. I leave here with more hope than I think I have ever felt before. I feel a little like dancing.”
B: “Hmmmm. Wonder where you got that impulse?”
S: “Wow, chills. I leave here with hope! Gosh, there is hope! Let me know… So, we’d better get to the service; we’re going to be late if we don’t get going.”
B: “Yeah, OK. Who’s doing the sermon? What is the sermon today?”
S: “D’s doing it; and it’s about ‘The Power of Quan Yin.”
B: “Whoa, are you serious? Quan Yin?”
S: “Well, yes. Why?”
B: “Well, I just told you that I did a huge thing dancing with shadow. And then an invitation to a ‘shifting the shadow’ thing. And we did it on the new moon within the solar eclipse.”
S: “And… the sermon…”
B: “Quan Yin is the mother goddess of compassion. She is depicted in many ways… one is the dragon; she can be fiercely compassionate. She can also be divine mother and nurturer. The legend goes… she practiced spiritually until she reached the stage of enlightenment where the next step is Nirvana. She was poised to step away from the world and into the light of the cosmos when she heard the cries of human beings still suffering in shadow. She had great compassion for their pain, their woundedness, their intense suffering. Instead of going on to Nirvana, she turned around and stepped back into the world. She decided to go back and stay, lending her energy until everyone here reaches enlightenment and is ready to step into Heaven or Nirvana. Quan Yin is linked to the moon—she’s considered the goddess of the New Moon.”
S: “Wow such Divine synchronicity!”
B: “Yes, and a little dance from another moonwalker.”



Saturday

Hanging out with Michael Jackson

My research into the life and body of work of Michael Jackson began after something in me stirred in the theater...
This has been quite the journey! My writings have been shared with fans worldwide and I have been receiving the most incredible thoughtful and heart-centered letters from people all over this globe. Michael touched people in a very deep and profound way that few ever have. There are millions of people in our world who live in their heartspace and know how to love because of Michael and Michael's messages to the world. I call them MJ's "Sparkle People" because they shimmer like his Billie Jean jacket. In this space now and for the future, I share my remarkable journey of hanging out with Michael Jackson.

A Glance in the Mirror

I swear you can’t make this stuff up. Occasionally I still take private duty nursing clients: children who are dependent on ventilators that assist them with breathing. They attend school on portable vents and need to wear what we call an HME or Humidivent that moisturizes and warms the air before it enters their trachs (tracheostomy.) The non-medical name for an HME is an “artificial nose.” The kids don’t like them much and often take them off; getting them to wear their noses becomes a game between kids and their nurses. It’s how they keep us in line.

Yesterday at school, one of the teachers started talking about how another nurse on the case had “changed the nose and put a new one on just yesterday.” One Teacher’s Aid commented how at first she thought that “artificial nose” referred to some kind of cosmetic surgery.

So one teacher looks at the other and says about my client: “Maybe we should start calling him Michael Jackson because they keep changing his nose and putting on a new one. It keeps coming off; he keeps losing it... (laughter).

The Occupational Therapist chimes in: “Oh well maybe his nose fell off because of that disease that he had… (wink, wink) the one that changed his color too... (more laughter.)

You can only imagine where the conversation went from there. And you can imagine where my mind went from there. And my temperature. Where… I… went from there. I could feel my Inner Michael…

I was surprised at the level of anger I heard in my voice when I had heard enough: “You know, Vitiligo is a real disease and it does make skin pasty white. .. please, the man is dead!” and that is as far as I got. I must have turned white myself with anger. One look at me and the room went silent.

It took me a long time to breathe myself back down the adrenalin slope but it didn’t take long to realize how I had mishandled that situation. I had a perfectly good opportunity to be calm, to state the facts about Vitiligo and Michael Jackson but instead I let my shadow off-leash to run loose. To growl. My shadow, under her breath, called them “ignorant” and thought them “moronic.”

I immediately regretted not having rehearsed a little speech for just such an occasion. If It comes up again, I promise you I will have one ready. Why? Because the moment that was teachable (pun intentional) called for response, not a reaction. And now it is forever lost. Instead of making them feel uncomfortable and myself seem aloof and superior, I could have educated them in a kind way and turned a shadow situation into enlightenment for everybody.

Yes, I was raw and tender having spent so much time already wandering around in the dark with Michael and I admit it wouldn’t have taken much to push me over the edge, but instead of making the world brighter, I added more shadow.

The one thing you learn as a peace activist is that when you are standing on a corner holding a sign, the last thing you or anyone in your group should ever do is engage in a verbal war with a person from the opposing side. The training preparation involves learning how to not be pulled into an argument and to listen, really listen to your opposition. (“No one wants to be defeated.”) And the other thing that is really savvy is to prepare in advance answers to the questions you are likely to be asked. Then if a reporter comes up and sticks a mic under your mouth, you have something coherent and intelligent to say.Yesterday I was neither. I should have known better.

It was painful because there were children in the room. I was not being a very good role model. I wasn’t prepared. I wasn’t thoughtful or warm or prepared to go toe-to-toe in a civilized way. We all might have learned something important had I taken a breath first and handled it differently. ‘I’m sorry Michael; it won’t happen again. Promise.’

Thursday

Gotta Love the Dreamers- the Dialogue

J: “Just how is it assisting Michael Jackson for you to suffer so?”
B: “I don’t see it as assisting Michael Jackson. It’s not Michael who will benefit; not any longer. I think all suffering is relevant. It is relevant for all of us. We still seem to need to learn from fear, suffering and pain. I hope we fill up on that one soon. I look forward to when we can learn from joy, from love. That is where I want to be and I hope I can see some of it happening before the end of my lifetime.”
J: “I have watched you through this. I see the pain. I hear it in your voice. I’ve watched the tears come and not stop. I’ve seen the overwhelm.”
B: “And I thank you for being there. Sometimes it really gets to me; how can it not? That much shadow heaped upon one person! Relentless! Wham. Slam. And such a gentle and generous man! Do you know that he personally supported something like 33 charities, most for children? His humanitarian awards are legion. It's just so very, very dense, this shadow. If I find it hard to keep going through just the research, think what he must have endured. I don’t know how he stayed vertical! As for the overwhelm, it’s part of the deal you make. Unless you’re an artist, it’s hard to explain and harder yet to understand. But I think that it comes with the territory of the muse. You’ve read my “A Poet Tries to Write 9/11” and "Missile Silo in North Dakota- that one took five years." The pain was like jumping into a bottomless void, a black hole. It was huge. It was hard to survive it. Hard to breathe. The thing about the muse, especially one who is a poet, too, is that we have to feel it. We can’t do it without feeling it.”
J: “To feel it like that? Is there is no way to buffer it? You have a survival plan? Tell me your plan. How will you do this?”
B” “Well, doesn't matter; there really is no saying ‘no.’ It’s like the Hound of Heaven, it’s going to get you; you might run for awhile, but it’s going to catch you. Better just not to run. Here is how it is… In order to write whatever it is, the poet or muse must take it all into her body, must let it live there. Let it settle in. It is like body surfing; the wave comes and washes over you and you are tumbled by the sea of feeling. There is nothing to be done but to let it have its way with you. You can’t stop the torrent; you can’t stem that kind of tide. It has to take your breath away and leave you in darkness, in a deep watery grave place. Then only from there, can it vomit itself back out and spill onto paper. There is just no other way to do it. At least not for me. And not for most artists.”
J: “I worry about you… being an empath.”
B: “Yeah. Blessing and curse. I can’t help it. It’s always been that way for me. That was really useful when I was doing group therapy because I knew what people were feeling; it echoed in my body. At times it's an advantage except when it's not. I know it and feel it all at once; it gets in my bones. I think that is why I empathize and understand Michael so much. I get how he worked; I feel what he felt. I am having a really hard time right now because I’ve spent the last weeks in shadow because that was what I was writing. I can’t believe the world treated him the way it did. I can’t believe it would treat anyone that way! The sheer meanness of it! The dark was cavernous. The digging for dirt and making up stories was like relentless gleeful grave-digging. The attacks to his appearance, his skin color, his very beingness. Who else could he be? Who else could any of us be? It's one thing if people don't like you for what you are doing; but when they don't like you for who you are, well, what exactly can you do to fix that? Change your face? Yeah, maybe. We would never treat any child that way and Michael was a child of God just like the rest of us. He was a child of the world. And child-like. So sensitive. Such an easy target.”
J: “You know how it works… the brighter the light, the more the shadow.”
B: “But why? I have a hard time accepting that. Sometimes it's just mean. It doesn’t have to be that way. I believe the human race is better than that. It just breaks my heart. Not because it’s Michael Jackson, but because the world could do that to someone! To anyone. It’s hard to fathom. It’s hard to come face to face with that kind of darkness. That cynnicism. It’s hard to feel its power in the world.”
J: “That’s my point. How is being in the midst of all that agony helping you? Helping him?”
B: “You know, I am not sure that it can be done any other way. I think the suffering is part of taking on my piece of the shadow. Maybe it’s the one piece that I can take from the collective and let it percolate through me. Maybe my tears can cleanse it. Maybe I can transform it by letting it break my heart. By letting it season me, make me softer. Maybe when it wrings me out, I can breathe the clarity and the light back into the world. Maybe that is all I can do for Michael.”
J: “So you think that we shrink the collective shadow through processing it within ourselves?”
B: “Something like that. I do think so. The shadow leaves its imprint. It is in the field, in the space. It lingers and spreads around the planet. It makes for thick emotional sludge. It’s not nice to live in. I want my space and my world compassionate, clean, loving, embracing all people, making miracles. Michael took on the world’s shadow for me. It’s the least I can do for him.”
J: “You know the Buddhist way is to accept the play of light and shadow. Michael seems to have attracted a large volume of shadow. He had to hold a lot of light and visibility to attract that much shadow. People are attracted to that kind of light- for all kinds of reasons.”
B: “You would have me do nothing? It’s not in me. That is too passive for me. I came to change the world. So did Michael; he just had a much bigger presence, a much bigger platform—the whole world the stage.”
J: “But when someone is a larger than life public figure and they deliberately promote themselves in order to gain attention and to communicate the message, they have to be willing to take the shadow aspect that comes with it. They are going to draw shadow, be scrutinized, criticized and attacked. The shadow is going to show up. It’s human nature and it’s just the way it works. Tich Nat Hahn talks about that, about the balance and the wise mind...”
B: Are you trying to tell me that wise mind is just passively accepting what is? So I should just embrace the world the way it is? I should put out the fire? Cover my light? You’re a Buddhist. And I love the path. I took a vow of non-violence with His Holiness the Dalia Lama. He said to take the path of non-violence. He told the monks not to act out anger but he never said to do nothing. That’s not an active principle. That doesn’t make the world better. It might make it peaceful and make you more peaceful but it doesn’t do much for the rest of humanity. I can’t do it that way. We, as a collective race of humans aren’t doing some things right. We create things that destroy. Like the chem-weapons, for example. Are you saying that I should not have gotten involved because there was potential for pain, for personal suffering? You know, if those things that are stockpiled are ever unleashed, we'll never have to worry about the world’s shadow again because there won’t be a world to cast one.”

J: "And you visited suffering then too."
B: "Of course; it's scary. You get up close and personal with the darkest of human nature. The sheer magnitude will stagger anyone. Two canisters the size of wine bottles would turn the Super Bowl into a morgue. And, yes, there were some who would have sabotaged the program because their ego got bruised. That's shadow too. Someone didn't want to play nice or share and liked the conrol lever too much. Forget to leave your ego at the door and shadow sneaks in. Sometimes people don't see the bigger picture. After my column appeared someone wrote and asked why I didn't spend my time and energy volunteering in my own country, my own community? I responded as kindly as I could that I did do some volunteer work in my own backyard. But I also said that if we didn't do something about the WMDs cooperatively in Russia and here, and we destroyed the world by war-making and stockpiling weapons that could kill the whole planet many times over, that my backyard wasn't going to matter much. Sometimes you have to point out that there's a bigger picture."
J: “But why you? Why suffer in this way? You understand that this is the martyr archetype.”
B: “Yes, I get that. Maybe I was Joan in another lifetime. Why not me? I guess I’m still a Flower Child and I still believe in humanity. And I believe that if I’m not part of the solution, I am part of the problem. I know in my heart it can be better. We are capable of it. You saw what happened with the Tsunami in Indonesia, how the whole world rallied, how they are doing it now with the earthquake in Haiti. How is it that we humans can do that—rise to that level of brilliance and compassion in a crisis but one smallish man who started with nothing but a talent that wouldn’t be contained, who only wanted to make music is destroyed by human inhumanity. It was terrorism. Homeland terrorism.”
J: “You can’t mean that; I think that is overwhelm talking.”
B: “I do mean it. I absolutely mean it. What is the difference between planning to bring a country to its knees and trying to bring one man to his knees? Only the population numbers change. They’re both blood sport. Only the scale is different. You can’t be a little bit pregnant; how can you be a little bit terrorist? Terrorism is terrorism whatever the scale. You can be a terrorist in traffic and you can traffic terrorism. I’m filled up on it. Aren’t you? It’s time to change the paradigm. People really don’t want to do this anymore. Lots of traditional structures are falling—the church, Wall Street, the banking system. We don’t want to do it this way any longer. We just haven’t figured out how to build the new structure and we don’t have a clear blueprint yet. But we can’t continue this way. The old ways are not working. We can’t keep destroying our planetary treasures like John Lennon, Lady Diana and Michael. God help us if Bono ever falls from grace.
J: “But people expect certain standards and they will always look to those in the limelight. They will always project shadow on celebrity.
B: “No! Celebrities don’t have to be targets of our jealousy, our judgment, our darkest selves. It is not their job to carry our inadequacies for us! It is not our right to ask or question their private lives, pry into their sexuality and demand secrets from them. We don’t have the right to stalk them in dark and devious ways to take something that doesn’t belong to us. It’s nothing less than assault! Especially those who are artists and entertainers— they have and are gifts that should be respected and cherished.
J: “But they are in the public eye. People in the public eye have an obligation… “
B: “That might be true if we elect them. Entertainers and artists don’t work for us. We don’t pay them to represent us. It’s real arrogance to think they are accountable to us or to demand their lives for our own amusement or plunder.”
J: “But there are certain standards that the world expects…”
B: “And I am telling you that it is the world that is wrong! We are wrong. The standards need to change! We have lost something! We have forgotten something essential! We have become walking shells of human beings—the innards are missing. The heart isn't there! We have made things dirty that are not. We are too willing to believe the worst about someone. We are too eager to fear. We have been conditioned to see the glass as half empty. We look for the dark instead of the light. We have lost our innocence! It’s not naïve to have the qualities of honesty and innocence; it’s refreshing. The nightly news does not highlight our human achievements but exposes our human failings. We don’t congratulate very well anymore. We don’t share well, play well with others. We run with scissors with the intention to cut people up. We take drugs to stop depression, to lift our mood, to slim down, to calm down, to sleep. We pay athletes obscene amounts of money while Nobel Prize winners write grants and beg for funding. We adopt companion animals and mistreat them; we slaughter other animals in dark and isolated places after the abysmal environments they are raised in only to display their by-products in sparkling plastic wrap in a sterile-like marketplace. We call those who work toward saving the planet “liberal tree huggers” and those who fight for human rights “bleeding hearts" as if they're epithets instead of something noble.” Something full and loving, compassionate and nourishing is missing. Something sparkling is gone. And I am telling you we are capable of so much better, of being so much more! We need to get some sparkle! We desperately need some sparkle.”
J: “You need some sparkle. Where are you going to get replenished when you’re this empty; when you’re this empty again?”
“I’m going to think about making a difference. I am going to think about Michael Jackson and remember what he endured for us and all the while he still loved the world; he never gave up on it! I am going to dream about the time when we, the world, will cherish those who are gifted among us and are gifts to us and we appreciate and embrace all—their wonder and their warts. When we put integrity above commerce and materialism. When we tell the truth because it’s the right thing to do. When we stop terrorizing and start tenderizing. That’s it! That’s what we should do!”
J: “what should we do?”
B: “Instead of a terrorist movement, we should start a ‘Tenderist Movement!’
J: “Wow, what an idea! You’re such a dreamer! Gotta love the dreamers!
B: “Yeah, and they love you more.”

Saturday

Michael and Shadow



"Shadow Bag" Scott Snibbe Interactive Art catalog

(c)2005





“If they say why, why? Tell them that is human nature. Why, why do they do me this way?” ~ © "Human Nature" Porcaro and Bettis performed by Michael Jackson, Thriller Album

Michael Jackson’s music indicates that he may have understood a lot about human nature. When asked questions about how people viewed him and characterized him, he said he supposed it was human nature and that it came with the territory of fame.

Shadow is the dark side of human nature that we’d all like to deny: Shadow is what causes us to do wrong and justify it; shadow is catering to the ego of self at the expense of others; shadow is treating someone differently by some obscure definition; shadow is being unscrupulous in how we make money; shadow is acquiring something of value on the backs of others; shadow is wanting or taking something that doesn’t rightfully belong to us. Greed, envy, malicious gossip, professional and personal jealousy, unexamined and untamed anger, false pride, conniving, scheming, retribution and a self that is out of integrity and acts from there, all come from human shadow. We all have shadow; we’d all rather not.

We have an idealized self that we aspire to and want to believe that we are. We never quite measure up to that ideal self. We idealize others and put them on pedestals and we are angry and condemning when they fall from grace. We mask in order to keep shadow from reflecting on us and we project it onto others to hide those undesirable qualities from ourselves. We will do cartwheels to keep ourselves from exposing, acknowledging or revealing the dark part of ourselves. We use unhealthy means to divert our attention from the darkness that lives within and we use up a lot of energy hiding.

When we accuse others, judge others, point fingers or call names, it is our own shadow that is at work. When they are obviously: “ignorant,” “stupid,” “immature,” “a loser” or any of the other judgments that condemn, that’s our shadow talking. Highlighting those characteristic in others is an attempt to deny them in ourselves.

“I’m starting with the man in the mirror; I’m asking him to change his ways. No message could have been any clearer: if you wanna make the world a better place, look at yourself then make a change.” © Sideah Garrett “Man in the Mirror” performed by Michael Jackson

Michael is asking us to begin healing our own shadow so that we don’t project it into the world and onto others. The “man in the mirror” is the individual shadow of shame and embarrassment. When denied or repressed, unhealed shadow springs up and brings us some form of punishment: failure, loss, isolation, misery, depression, relationship schisms, addictions, missed opportunities and other ways that we unconsciously punish or invite doom. Unexamined and unhealed shadow makes us feel unworthy or unlovable and that is what plays out in our lives.

There is another shadow that often goes unnamed and unexamined: the collective shadow of humanity or the vector of everyone’s shadow. This shadow inhabits the field and encapsulates everyone in it. It is the invisible dark soup that we live in but don’t see. It may express as cultural traits, a national pastime, a diversion, a meme, a preoccupation, a trend, an ism that lives in the collective sphere of influence. This collective shadow sometimes coalesces and is projected onto others in the form of: public disdain, an enemy or country conveniently become a target, a politician we love to hate, a celebrity whom we have placed on a pedestal who now has disappointed us, a public figure fallen from grace, a notorious criminal we can loathe, the political assassin who took a beloved from our camp forgetting there is another camp, an organization that is caught in scandal… and many others. We can heap our disowned shadow on the figures of situations conveniently convincing ourselves that “they” and not we are shadowy loathsome characters.

The target of shadow, deservedly or not, is something or someone we love to hate, ridicule, scoff at, be disgusted by, point fingers at, accuse, hold in contempt or shame, call uncivilized or barbaric, or any number of dark projections designed to aim more away from self than to cast onto someone else. We exact judgment, even unwarranted, and we look for evidence to support that judgment. We relish a scandal because it takes the heat off us.

We like to “bring down uppity women;” we delight in ”making them eat crow; "taking him to task;" "watching them sweat'” "holding her feet to the fire;" "cutting him down to size." and any number of ways that we mentally even the score imagined as unbalanced in our own minds. Shadow delights in this gladiator sport.

Shadow keeps criminals in business, corporations hiding mistakes, critical recall information secret, car manufacturers from reporting safety risks, drug companies from exposing side effects, tire manufacturers from revealing flaws, organizations fudging reports, companies from revealing hazards, environmental problems from being rectified voluntarily, and people from saying “I was so very wrong!”

Visible collective shadow keeps yellow journalism alive, and keeps tabloid press spewing vile and toxic sensationalism. Our shadow keeps questionable media in business. When not owned and projected onto others like groups, institutions, celebrities, politicians, shadow is hurtful, harmful and mean spirited. Shadow wounds. It wounds deeply and irreversibly. Shadow shows no mercy. Why? Because it wants to bleed its victim. It is blood sport. Yes, shadow kills.

Michael Jackson encountered a lot of shadow in his lifetime:

"Like the old Indian proverb says do not judge a man until you've walked two moons in his moccasins. Most people don't know me, that is why they write such things in which most is not true. I cry very, very often because it hurts and I worry about the children—all my children all over the world, I live for them.

If a man could say nothing against a character but what he can prove, history could not be written.

Animals strike, not from malice, but because they want to live, it is the same with those who criticize; they desire our blood, not our pain. But still I must achieve, I must seek truth in all things. I must endure for the power I was sent forth, for the world, for the children. But have mercy, for I've been bleeding a long time now." ~ Michael Jackson (circa 1995) written on hotel stationery.

Michael Jackson was one of the most visible, prolonged and known targets of collective shadow on this planet. Michael’s interest was in cheerleading humanity and teaching people that they could “make the world a better place” if they embraced bright shadow within themselves. Bright shadow, the opposite of dark shadow, is the inner being’s highest potential. It’s the Divine Blueprint. Michael embraced his own Bright Shadow whose outlet was his creativity.

Michael took on shadow and recruited others to come and shine instead alongside him. A humanitarian who truly believed that it was within humanity’s power to change the world, he kept on message throughout his life. A champion for the world’s children, he visited hospitals and orphanages all over the world bringing gifts and money to improve their conditions. Neverland Ranch hosted disadvantaged children every month, those vacations a reminder to inner city, ill and disadvantaged kids that there is more to the world than pain, that fun and hope are still alive and that they might escape their conditions. But mostly Michael wanted children to know that an adult who made it to adulthood with his inner child intact, cared deeply about them!

Michael did not share the world’s cynicism about adult-child relationships. He saw and cherished the innocence of children. He understood children because as an adult, he was not so far out from childhood that he forgot how children think and feel. A sensitive empath, Michael suffered a huge emotional reaction to what happened at Columbine and wanted to prevent another occurrence. He was invited to speak at Oxford University and given an honorary degree. In his Super Bowl performance Michael highlighted children from all over the world—every culture, color and ethnicity. Michael was often photographed within crowds of children.

When the world’s shadow descended on him it was sinister. Michael found himself accused of the darkest shadow behavior that could betray the innocence of a child. Two families driven by personal greed impaled Michael Jackson with the one thing that would do the most harm to his heart. Instantly bastardized in “breaking news,” a media panting at the magnitude of the story, pandering to the cult of celebrity, titillated by scandal and gleeful at filling a 24 hours news cycle with the downfall of a “king,” they focused non-stop on the most visible and wealthy person on the planet. It was the same kind of voyeurism that stops to stare at injured or dead victims of auto accidents—the fascination with witnessing some kind of morbid demise or decay.

A review of trial transcripts, legal filings and checks on reputations and backgrounds of attorneys and officials involved reveals much about the motive of all, including Micael's accusers. A close look uncovers prior extortion attempts on other celebrities and corporations as well as documentation of a threat to destroy the star if he refused to bankroll ambitions of parasitic parents whose children he befriended, some while they were gravelly ill.

Michael had dangled the carrot of a visit to Neverland to a boy ill with stage IV cancer who eventually became an accuser. Actually the boy refused to testify against Michael asserting he had done nothing wrong. It was the boy's father who brought charges. He had asked Michael to bankroll a career shift fom dentist to screenplay writer. Michael refused.


Michael's ministrations and nightly phone calls to the sick child from wherever he was in the world and while on tour, kept the boy fighting for his life through chemotherapy. It kept him alive. What child wouldn’t want to hang on for a personal play date with Michael Jackson at Neverland Ranch? And what parent would veto that? Parents were invited to come along with their children on tours and appearances in exotic locations and in the best hotels. And if your child gets well in the meantime, who would want to leave quietly and give up that kind of privileged lifestyle?

Three different grand jurys said no to prosecutors who wanted to try the 1993 case that was eventually settled out of court by Michael's insurance company over Michael's objections.

Prosecutors and news media made a huge deal of Michael hosting children in his “bedroom.” What they failed to explain about Michael’s “bedroom” was that it was actually a two story suite within his mansion and not only did he host children there but their parents as well. “Sharing your bed” in Michael’s world was in the spirit of Friday night popcorn and movies and Saturday morning gatherings where children pile into our beds to talk, giggle, ask questions and let us in on their otherwise secret lives. Michael and other adults slept on the floors or on couches. There’s an intimacy in bedrooms that allows for this kind of connection. It’s a family intimacy that is not “adult” in content, nor sexual, or sinister. Michael’s own children joined in these movie nights and sleep-overs. How many of us could withstand an accusation about ours or others’ children that we might host in our two story home? In our vacation cottage or camping tents? How many of us could survive it through a very public and worldwide frenzy?

The District Attorney who prosecuted both cases interviewed hundreds of children and their families even going out of the country to try to find the “dirt” on Michael Jackson. There was none to find. How is it that Michael was charged on ten counts yet he was found innocent of all charges? How does that happen? No convictions? Not guilty on even a single count? What Michael Jackson was accused of just didn’t live in his world, but it apparently lived in the world of the D.A. who brought the charges on both cases.

Does it reach beyond “duty” when a District Attorney refuses to give back seized belongings, saving them for ten years? When he can’t find anyone to corroborate the charges or incriminate either locally or in this country so he goes around the world looking for those who would accuse? When he continues for a decade even after not finding even one child more? Men who prey on children are serial offenders. Is it overkill to send 70 deputies with a search warrant to swarm over a sanctuary for children? To search and photograph every corner of someone's private life and world looking for evidence of something to hang on a man beloved in every corner of this globe? How many of us could withstand that kind of obsession and sweeping invasion?

The charges against Michael didn’t surface until after the Martin Bashir documentary that painted him in the worst possible light. Michael expected Bashir to expose his heart and the real Michael Jackson to the world. A shy person who avoided public speaking, Michael was uncomfortable with interviews or speaking out. Michael was only comfortable performing on stage. He was convinced that a journalist with sensitivity and scruples could set the record straight about him. It is well known that Bashir gained Michael’s confidence and then left the kind, magnanimous, humanitarian, normal and doting parent who was Michael Jackson on the cutting room floor. Bashir manipulated a trusting Michael and led him to slaughter with a tabloid-style documentary. Michael himself was a film buff who had filmed the entire series of interviews with Bashir so he was able to release what Bashir had maliciously bastardized or omitted. But the damage was already done. The documentary gave Michael’s accusers opportunity and they pounced.

Children did flock to Michael; they did follow him like the Pied Piper. Children are not fooled. They know when adults have hidden motives. They know when they feel “icky” around certain adults; they avoid them. Children liked Michael and longed to be close to him because he embodied the unabashed joy and wonder that children feel slipping from them as they realize they are soon expected to grow up. The world in demanding that we all grow up and abandon our inner child loses something important—the innocence and simplicity of childlike authenticity. Children know who cares and who doesn’t. Children clung to Michael because he represented something gossamer that they felt slipping from them. Letting go of childhood is painful; it’s traded for the despairing reality that we don’t much care for the world we are inheriting. And we don’t especially care for the adult mind that we are being asked to become. Are we all so far out from childhood that we don’t remember?

Michael often said that he would never refuse attention to a child who needed him. He might have been guilty of not understanding the cynical mind, of not being able to predict the worst case scenarios, of naiveté`, of trusting the wrong people, of not understanding contemporary social and political culture because he was so isolated and insulated but his motives and humanitarian efforts were genuine and unequaled. Michael gave so much and shared his time with children simply because he could. He had the means and the heart to give children experiences that he never had. Michael allowed children with illnesses or special needs to travel with him to give them the excitement of hanging out with a superstar, introducing them to the world, and watching achievements that they could someday aspire to. He took his visibility and its responsibility and his position as role model very seriously.

If you wanted to destroy Michael Jackson, the surest way to do it was to accuse him of harming children. It was simply not in him. The destruction was emotional, psychological, career damaging, financial, devastating to image and reputation and very, very personally wounding. The damage to Michael was irrevocable. The shadow’s reach was gigantic because Michael was known and beloved all over the world. The shadow the world projected drowned him. It would have immediately killed a lesser man. Maybe it was the beginning of his dying.

Meanwhile, the rest of the world wondered what America and its media was doing to this kind, sensitive and generous humanitarian. The conclusions? America is a dangerous place. America delights in shadow. Americans relish destroying their national treasures. America’s media is drinking the Kool-Aid.

The reporters at the trial were legion. What trial were they attending? Which one were they reporting on? When Michael was found innocent of the charges on each of ten counts, the news organizations were stunned into silence. How could his innocence have been so unexpected? Was there any clue that the man might not be guilty? What story were they covering? An invented tabloid story? Or the truth?

The real tragedy of this dark and sorry example of collective human shadow is not only what it did to Michael who was apparently innocent all along, but to the children who, in the future, would never benefit from a day at Neverland… the children who couldn’t be inspired… who wouldn't ever know a world beyond their danger-filled "hood," who now could not be saved… because Michael had to declare on advice from counsel “I will never again allow myself to be in such a vulnerable position.” He never went back to Neverland. In fact, he didn’t go back to America.

Michael never saw the shadow coming. It didn’t live in his world until it loomed up to impale him in the most vulnerable of places—his generous heart. Would you see the shadow coming? Will you stand and face it with integrity when it comes for you? Will you stand at all? Will you keep your composure while they draw blood and suckle at your life force?

Is the shadow still at work in the world? Is it still focused on Michael Jackson? Well, yes it is still at work; and no, it’s no longer focused on the man himself because he’s no longer here. But his artwork is. The shadow now falls on Michael’s collection of art while recruited pundits perform psychological autopsies and "diagnose" a client they've never seen. Michael's art is filled with cherubs who represent archetypal bright shadow in the works of the masters; with whimsical creatures who resurrect imagination; with mystical figures who communicate beauty and divine essence; with history’s most brilliant and larger than life characters who inspired Michael to reach within to find his own genius, divinity and brilliance. Prominent in the portraits is Michael himself. He had the artist paint him in. Michael embraced his God given talent and knew himself to be a divine child so he commissioned it in his art. It’s what Christ and other world teachers told us to do. And there are some pieces with shiny faced children who are riveted on a single figure who is doting on them, reading to them, nurturing them, leading them and cherishing them. That singular figure in the portraits is Michael Jackson.

Were we all to embrace our Bright Shadow, we would all shimmer with light and resolve to make the world a better place. If we would but reach into the mirror for our darkest shadow and grasp what we find behind it—we too would dress that emerging sacred hand forever in a sequined glove. For it would grasp our brilliance and bring it through to here, to now. Our shadow, the wounded part of us that feels unloved and unworthy would no longer be the lost child. Once acknowledged, cradled and transformed by embrace and not abandonment-- L.O.V.E.-- it would find life. It is in the juice of that dark cocoon of shadow that the milk of nourishment awaits the transfigured butterfly that flies free and beautiful.

The world lost a treasure when it lost Michael Jackson. The biggest loser in this story of collective dark shadow is …. us. We, as the collective, have lost something somewhere that was essential, something that encouraged us to be alive and not deadened inside, something innocent and fresh and beautiful and God inspired, something that sparkled, something that spoke the best of our species, something patient and silent while waiting the final word, something that could embrace the lonely waif in another only looking for acceptance and love, something democratic and generous and willing to believe, something brave that doesn’t succumb to fear, something that demands truth, something with human luster. Something like... say, the world's greatest and longest cheerleader? Go humanity. Go team.

We allowed this to happen. We let the shadow hunger for tabloid secrets and lust for a voyeur’s peek at a larger than life figure. That taste for carnage killed both Princess Diana and Michael Jackson. We wanted someone to chase them, to revel in revealing their secrets and humanness, to gawk at who we think they are being that we are not. And when we realize what we have done, we will re-summon more of our own shadow to make excuses. To justify. To make light of our complicity. To explain away our culpability, to protest and declare our innocence.


Who is next? Where will our blood lust take us now? Who will we cannibalize tomorrow? Whose private life will we want exposed? Whose sexuality will we arrogantly demand revealed? What have we done? What have we lost? How can we make it right? We can’t. It’s too late. "This is It." The man is dead. Shadow wins.




This is it? What now? Can we transform dark shadow?

The piece about Michael and Shadow was disturbing, yes. Shadow is disturbing. And the kind of dark shadow that Michael Jackson had to duel was not a pretty commentary on human nature. Truth is sometimes painful. We look away because we can't bear it. Shadow is defeated when it is revealed in truth and honesty. An honest and direct look is not always easy.

It is quite probable that those who are guilty of heaping shadow on Michael know somewhere in their hearts what they did. We always know. To expect them to make amends is asking them to face squarely the darkest part of self. And as we see, it is not easy to look it steadily in the face.

The field and memes or cultural myths surrounding Michael and his story are concretized or solidified in the minds of many. The field can be changed. We, together can take on shadow and we can transform it. It is a high game we play. Ready?
Then click: Here

Monday

Michael and Androgyny

Is androgyny a phase or is it the evolutionary impulse of humankind? What is androgyny? It is the embracing and blending of both male and female characteristics in the human being. Androgyny is reflected in a look, in dress, in esthetics such as makeup and jewelry as it relates to human sexuality and gender.

Look no further than the fashion runway to see the trend changing. The “look” is a blend of soft and strong, yin and yang, swish and slash, and sexy asexual. The yin and yang blend is neither overtly masculine nor feminine but features both in modern style. The new urban “Metrosexual” is a more blended, progressive and androgynous style for men.

If you remember Boy George or David Bowie, they exemplified the androgynous male as does Prince. It’s no longer fashionable to be exclusively the aggressive, hard and dominating male figure. It’s no longer cool to be sexually threatening. It’s even acceptable now to have five gay men give you fashion and domestic advice from a “Queer Eye” perspective. How modern culture has relaxed! Rigid male and females roles must have been exhausting to maintain.

Androgyny is not new. Ancient Greece and Rome were more relaxed about sexuality and sexual identity. Men often had homosexual and well as heterosexual relationships. The rise of Christianity buried the androgynous principle and drove same sex relations underground and made it taboo and an abomination. Other cultures have been more liberal about sexuality and gender: Hindu gods and goddesses which depict the various aspects of God include androgynous characters like Shiva; Hapi of Egypt, Dionysus of Greece and Obatala of South America and the Caribbean are androgynous deities. There are numerous characters in history whom did not fit into specific gender roles of their culture. Strong women like Helen of Troy, Cleopatra, St. Joan and others were not “feminine” in the traditional sense. Male saints, mystics, artist and poets like Hafiz and Rumi did not fit the modern definition of “masculinity.”

A culture can be stern about its expectations and rules about gender characteristics and the norms can be strictly enforced. There are punishments for those who dare to deviate from the “norms” of a society when it comes to sexuality, gender and expression of human sensuality. Punishments range from banishment and ostracism, to harassment and even death.

Nothing seems to stir the lower emotions more than human sexuality and sexual identity issues. Sexuality and anger are processed in adjoining regions in the human body—the genitals and solar plexus so it is no surprise when they are confused or fused. Many men are still threatened by any deviation from the culturally embedded “male image” and will attack representations of that threat. Actually, the human fetus has characteristics of both sexes and is born with both male and female sets of hormones. Androgyny is natural.

The feminist and gay rights movements, the rise of glam rockers like Bowie and Prince, the cinematic rise of “tough females” like Angelina Jolie and Uma Thurman, the revealed sensuality of Madonna, Beyonce and shocker Adam Lambert have helped to reshape culture from exclusionary and harsh into a more inclusive, tolerant and democratic form. It is a message to value all people.

But even before all of the movements and the direct assaults on social norms and conscience by daring modern entertainers, there was Michael Jackson. His ever-changing but androgynous look, his boyish manner, use of makeup and flamboyant dress was a cutting edge androgynous message. Michael’s androgynous “look” was often interpreted as asexual and was impetus for much speculation, sarcasm and joking about his sexuality and gender identity. His “You are Not Alone” music video is the perfect picture of androgyny. His solo piece in that short film combines a sense of boyish and non-threatening innocence with sensual physicality that can’t quite be characterized as “machismo” or even “male.” The later appearance of his wife, Lisa Marie Presley and Michael partially disrobed conveys a Greco-Roman beauty and romance yet makes clear the sensuality and sexual sparks between them, confirmed by Lisa Marie in later interviews.

Why was Michael Jackson’s “identity” under so much scrutiny in his lifetime? His gender, sexuality, looks, face, sensual dance, relationships and private life seemed “up for grabs” by and in the public. A frenzied media speculated about everything in regard to Michael’s sexuality and gender identity. Both sexes found Michael attractive. Perhaps it was Michael alone who was not confused but clear about himself, his role and his message?


Did Michael purposely challenge cultural norms and gender roles? Michael was ahead of his time in the thrust past prejudice and ignorance and toward an evolution into unity and acceptance of all human beings as equal members of the human family. Did a brilliant and cunning Michael Jackson deliberately challenge Puritanical and harsh cultural law about gender as well as race? Did Michael Jackson know exactly what he was doing as he and his work morphed over a lifetime? Michael has affirmed so many times that his work was Divinely inspired art. If so, then Michael might have been more genius and spiritual warrior in favor of the human family and evolution than previously recognized.

Friday

Michael Jackson and the Divine Feminine

We live in a world of duality. Duality means simply that if something is this, then it cannot be that. If it is not this, then it must be the other—the opposite. If it’s not up, it must be down; if not in, then it’s out; if you’re not right, then you must be wrong; it’s either black or it’s white. Things in our world tend to be polarized. The world of polarity sets up competition, jealousy, social strata, classism, racism and all the other isms of the world. It can be tribal—you’re one of us or you’re not. That approach is divisive, not inclusive and is a “male” or “masculine”principle. Male principle is active while female principle is passive. The human being has characteristics of both principles yet one is suppressed in favor of the other. Nature expresses both until humans mess with the balance. And the imbalance is reflected in the approach to nature and culture. Duality is an out-of-balance state.

In human affairs the male has traditionally been identified with leadership: the provider and protector. And women have been associated with mothering and keeping home and hearth. At one time, women couldn’t vote, work outside the home, go to public places unescorted, be leaders, politicians or own property. Women’s rights are relatively new on the scene. Equality for women began in earnest less than a half century ago with the "Women's Movement." In some places in the world, women are still oppressed.

Men have been in charge of the world, made the decisions, lead the armies, formed the government, governed the people. The masculine principle has governed human and world affairs for a long time. Women thought to be the weaker sex, were considered incapable of competent decision making or leadership. Women were excluded from real leadership roles.

Not so long ago, girls didn’t play with toy guns and boys didn’t have dolls. It was desirable to be macho, aggressive, warlike and superior—very masculine ways of being. And women were to be soft, feminine, perfumed and quiet. Not so long ago women and children were considered chattel and treated as possessions. Some cultures still treat genders unequally.

Gender bias plays out in the cultural world as a lack of balance. The acts of negotiation, reconciliation, cooperation, collaboration and diplomacy are feminine approaches to problems. The masculine way is mostly authoritarian, dictatorial war-like, to take by force, to invade or thrust into, to coerce. The imbalance that allowed the masculine to be considered the superior way and indeed the only way in some cultures has had a devastating effect on our planet. War has been the primary way of settling differences on Earth. The symbols and instruments of war are masculine—guns, bombs, tanks, gunships, stealth fighters and bombers, bullets, and rockets. How is it that these symbols of war are all phallic shapes? They mimic the male sexual organ in erection. The masculine is considered invasive while the feminine is receptive. Both sexes have inner traits of the opposite sex-- the anima for males and animus for females.

God is depicted as male. In fact the Christian Trinity is an all male club. "Male" systems are mostly authoritarian, hierarchical and patriarchal. The way of the masculine is violence, power and materialism. The male principle is largely responsible for the eco-disaster of pollution, global warming and overuse of scarce resources. Masculine without the balance of the feminine destroys equilibrium in a culture, in nature and on a world. Devaluing the feminine has had a devastating effect on Western culture. A society based in hierarchy rules from the top with power and exploits the masses. The feminine principle values family, children, home and environment, compassion, unity, inclusion, sacred circle. When the feminine is devalued, true intimacy and vitality are not possible.

The masculine and feminine principle operates not only culturally but spiritually and throughout the Universe. The Universe is a blend of both energies. Light is masculine while darkness is feminine; the moon is feminine while the sun is masculine. The Universe is a beautiful blending of the Yin (feminine principle) and Yang (masculine principle.) In flux and in balance, the play of light and darkness, of opposites blending and energies mingling is what makes creation work well.

There is a resurgence of the Divine Feminine on the planet, an impulse toward balance, a movement toward harmony. The planet is being viewed no longer as real estate, a male or masculine view. Earth is beginning to be seen as a system, an interdependent web, a living being called Gaia, the feminine goddess. This concept of wholeness and balance is a more healthy and balanced approach to planetary affairs. The arising of Divine Feminine energies on the planet is bringing back an interest in education, nurturing children and improving the quality of life. There is an impulse toward embracing life and beauty, nurturing and growing things—including people.

Machismo fears being seen as feminine so rarely were males depicted as sensitive, nurturing and gentle. Avoiding the "girly man" image was once an almost phobic pasttime for men. Some are still phobic about being identified with anything "feminine." Toughness is prized in maleness. If one cannot be " kind with self, it becomes harder to be kind to a planet, its ecosystem or its peoples. Bill Cosby was one of the first males to embrace a different kind of father figure and head of family. More and more men are finding a way to allow their feminine side expression. They are more yin and yang balanced because there is more cultural permission to be balanced with an integrated anima, Carl Jung's name for the inner feminine.

When you look at the work of Michael Jackson, you find many references to the Divine Feminine. In his “Bad” era he examines and dissects male aggression and its effect. He places fighting for the sake of posturing and machismo under a microscope. “The whole world has to answer right now just to tell you once again… who’s bad.” It is a parallel archetypal reference to the whole world being held hostage by the masculine.

In “Beat It” he highlights opposing gang members and how “funky” fighting is and how aggression because of “differences” and disputes leads them down a dangerous dead end road. He asks them to reconcile within themselves, to walk away, to leave because “no one wants to be defeated.” If you don’t fight, there is no defeat.

In “Black or White” Michael says it doesn’t matter. You don’t have to be this or that- one or the other. Identifying with an either-or mentality or racism which is a masculine principle of exclusion won’t work if you want to “be my baby” or “my brother.” Michael says "I'm not going to spend my life being a color." The concept of oneness, equality, racial indifference, inclusion, family, brotherhood, ‘we not me’, nurturing children, remembrance, and respect for all life is the Divine Feminine Principle in action and it is found throughout Michael's work.

In "Remember the Time" music video, Michael not only looks at a time when the feminine had more power-- ancient Egypt, he chose the oldest and most enduring culture on Earth for the setting of this film. Egypt is rich in spiritual myth, mystery and mysticism-- all feminine principles. It is said "man fears time but time fears the pyramids." Michael conveys and completely embodies the Divine Feminine in his costuming, appearance, and dance. The bird at the Pharaoh’s head which caused a bit of humor and concern for Eddie Murphy, is the symbol for Mother Maat, the Divine Feminine Mother Goddess of Egypt.

Michael was not afraid of being both masculine and feminine in his lyrics, his voice, dance and his films. He identified strongly with darkness and the moon—both Divine Feminine principles. Michael Jackson, through his body of work was doing his part to bring the masculine and feminine energies back to a world that had lost the balance. Michael was a great teacher, and a master of subliminal and not so subliminal suggestion.

He taught about the Divine Feminine, embodied it in his work, voice and self. Michael was not afraid to cry or express emotion. He promoted non-violence, the way of Gandhi, Martin Luther King and other great leaders. The message is-- it's OK to be a sensitive male; it's OK to feel; it's OK to cry. Many men didn't understand how women found Michael's attraction so magnetic and seductive. Threatened by Michael's attractiveness to females and his bold sensuality/sensitivity, they declared he must be gay! Michael was not gay and he kept his sexuality and intimate life private, as it should be. I suspect the reason so many females around the world were so attracted to Michael was because he expressed his feminine side through his sensitivity and work while expressing his sensual male side with with leather and buckles and dance moves. Michael masterfully was both at the same time: an embodiment of the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine-- the adept spiritual warrior in action.